Brilliance in marketing... sheer genius. Found on George Takei's Facebook page.
George points out the amazing fact... Right now Ralph Macchio is older than Pat Morita was when the made Karate kid. Pat was 52, Ralph is 53
Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Wednesday, February 26, 2014
Car wash sign that tops every one I've ever seen
Brilliance in marketing... sheer genius. Found on George Takei's Facebook page.
George points out the amazing fact... Right now Ralph Macchio is older than Pat Morita was when the made Karate kid. Pat was 52, Ralph is 53
Tuesday, February 25, 2014
Inhumane treatment of a Police dog! There's no air conditioning in a Gremlin! Another reason to not respect cops
Who ever would have guessed any police department had a Gremlin anyway?
Monday, February 24, 2014
George Tirebiter... a great mascot name if there ever was one!
a scraggly, mixed-breed stray dog from a beach in Santa Monica brought to campus who became student mascot at the University of Southern California in the 1940s. He was dubbed "Tirebiter" for his habit of racing alongside passing cars and bicycles while snapping furiously at their tires.
In 1947 the USC student body made George their mascot. He led the Trojan band onto the field for each home football game often costumed in a sweater and sometimes wearing odd little hats.
Tirebiter posed with homecoming queens and is remembered for once biting the mask nose of the rival UCLA’s Joe Bruin mascot (a person dressed in a bear costume and chased after Oski the Golden Bear mascot of the University of California Berkeley at another home game.
He was dog-napped in 1947 by pranksters from the rival school who shaved his fur to read "UCLA" and to take the prank one step further they took Tirebiter by the Los Angeles Times to be photographed for the paper.
found on http://www.tirebiter.com/
The lovable shaggy mutt quickly endeared himself to the student body. He was pampered by the fraternities and sororities in USC's greek community, routinely being carried back and forth from campus and being fed ice cream.
The student body held a memorial ceremony for Tirebiter on September 22, 1950. The ceremony consisted of a parade of convertibles with black bunting, a marching band, and the student body. Upon reaching Tirebiter's cement footprints, immortalized during Tirebiter's coronation in 1947, a memorial wreath was laid and a trumpeter played "Taps" as Troy said farewell to its beloved canine mascot
Rumor has it there is a transcript on file showing George with a GPA of 3.2 in such courses as Chasing Cats 101 and Biting Tires 270
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/George_Tirebiter
Sunday, February 23, 2014
Neil has come up with a set of rules for car shows that is funny and spot on
New Rules that Car Shows Should Adopt http://goldengeesenews.blogspot.com/2014/02/new-rules-that-car-shows-should-adopt.html
Car shows are like anything else. They are run by a very small group of people with little influence from the outside world with a bunch of participants who don’t have the backbone to speak up for common sense. The result is predictable - insanity.
If I could be the dictator of this country, in just a few short years, I could have everything straightened out. I don’t think that is going to happen anytime soon so maybe I should start out small.
Let me be the judge at car shows. There would be a new sheriff in town, with a whole new set of rules, like these:
Any car that had a sign saying anything remotely like “Don’t Touch” or “Hands Off” would be immediately disqualified from winning anything in any category. What? Your car is so fragile that it can’t handle being touched? Then what good is it? Leave it at home, or sell it to a museum.
Any car that was hauled in on a truck or trailer, will automatically finish below any that are driven to the show.
Anyone seriously trying to win anything should have current license plates for their vehicle.
Any car that does not have the ground clearance to make it over a speed bump, enter a normal driveway, or cross a set of railroad tracks will be penalized points, unless, the owner doesn’t give a shit and just gives it hell and bottoms out when meeting such obstructions. Points will be added for that.
There are already more than enough bone stock Tri 5 Chevys, Classic Mustangs, classic T-Birds and Corvettes in the world. If you have one of these, feel free to show it, but don’t count on winning anything.
Anything that irritates purists will be given additional bonus points. This includes Chevy motors in non-Chevy cars. Non-Chevy motors in Chevys are even better because that is less common. You gotta love a big block Chevy in a GTO, but a Corvette with a Ford engine would almost certainly earn best of show. I don’t care what it rolled off the assembly line with, a V8 always beats a six, (Unless the six has been heavily modified, that’s cool), and a big block always beats a small block.
Anyone caught displaying these faggy dolls, will not only be immediately disqualified, they will be asked to leave.
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With trucks, four wheel drive always beats two wheel drive, especially if a particular truck was never offered from the factory with four wheel drive.
17” maximum wheel diameters, unless the vehicle was originally available with larger diameter wheels.
Vehicle modifications that can be easily reversed are generally positives, (engine, tranny swaps, and rear end swaps, even throwing an old truck body on a 4x4 chassis.) ones that can’t and will probably leave the vehicle in a permanently altered state (e.g. wheel tubbing, unless the car is a true race car) are generally negatives. Unless it’s a Tri-5 Chevy, classic Mustang, classic T-Bird, or Corvette. There’s plenty of them. Go ahead and butcher them. Plus it makes the purists mad, and that’s always a good thing.
Door handles are good things. Factory rain gutters are good, (Lead sleds will be exempted from this.)
Owners caught cleaning their cars will lose points. You should have cleaned it before you brought it, and if you did, trust me, it’s clean enough. I can see through a day’s worth of dust. You’re there to have fun. Go buy a Coke and some popcorn, maybe a Big Bar, if you’re in Wisconsin, and go check out what other people brought. Maybe, go check out the swap meet. Don’t worry, your car will be fine, I won’t touch it, unless you got some gay sign saying “Don’t Touch”.
Dual exhaust always beats single exhaust, especially on vehicles that were not originally available with dual exhaust, like straight four and six cars, and wagons. Side pipes trump everything, unless they are not functional, in which case they are a negative.
Fake stuff, and non-functional stuff is frowned upon. Rat Rods with fake tri-power setups are exempt.
Better is better. Front disc brakes always beat front drum brakes, dual pot master cylinders always beat single pot master cylinders. 12 volts always beats 6 volts. Loud is good. Sweet sounding and loud is better.
Modified weird motors are good. Let’s see how much power someone can get out of a Studebaker or International truck engine. Lotsa motor always beats lotsa paint. I’d rather see a big block Nova with a few rust holes and the paint burned off the roof, hood, and trunk, than a perfect body and a weak motor.
I’ve never seen a custom interior that looks better than a stock interior.
I’ve seldom seen a custom paint job that looks better than a factory appearing paint job.
Vinyl graphics suck unless they were a factory option.
Manual transmissions always beat automatics. The more speeds, the better.
No sports cars with automatics will be considered as being worthy of winning any of the top three positions in any category, even if they are the only cars in a particular category.
http://goldengeesenews.blogspot.com/2014/02/new-rules-that-car-shows-should-adopt.html
Car shows are like anything else. They are run by a very small group of people with little influence from the outside world with a bunch of participants who don’t have the backbone to speak up for common sense. The result is predictable - insanity.
If I could be the dictator of this country, in just a few short years, I could have everything straightened out. I don’t think that is going to happen anytime soon so maybe I should start out small.
Let me be the judge at car shows. There would be a new sheriff in town, with a whole new set of rules, like these:
Any car that had a sign saying anything remotely like “Don’t Touch” or “Hands Off” would be immediately disqualified from winning anything in any category. What? Your car is so fragile that it can’t handle being touched? Then what good is it? Leave it at home, or sell it to a museum.
Any car that was hauled in on a truck or trailer, will automatically finish below any that are driven to the show.
Anyone seriously trying to win anything should have current license plates for their vehicle.
Any car that does not have the ground clearance to make it over a speed bump, enter a normal driveway, or cross a set of railroad tracks will be penalized points, unless, the owner doesn’t give a shit and just gives it hell and bottoms out when meeting such obstructions. Points will be added for that.
There are already more than enough bone stock Tri 5 Chevys, Classic Mustangs, classic T-Birds and Corvettes in the world. If you have one of these, feel free to show it, but don’t count on winning anything.
Anything that irritates purists will be given additional bonus points. This includes Chevy motors in non-Chevy cars. Non-Chevy motors in Chevys are even better because that is less common. You gotta love a big block Chevy in a GTO, but a Corvette with a Ford engine would almost certainly earn best of show. I don’t care what it rolled off the assembly line with, a V8 always beats a six, (Unless the six has been heavily modified, that’s cool), and a big block always beats a small block.
Anyone caught displaying these faggy dolls, will not only be immediately disqualified, they will be asked to leave.
With trucks, four wheel drive always beats two wheel drive, especially if a particular truck was never offered from the factory with four wheel drive.
17” maximum wheel diameters, unless the vehicle was originally available with larger diameter wheels.
Vehicle modifications that can be easily reversed are generally positives, (engine, tranny swaps, and rear end swaps, even throwing an old truck body on a 4x4 chassis.) ones that can’t and will probably leave the vehicle in a permanently altered state (e.g. wheel tubbing, unless the car is a true race car) are generally negatives. Unless it’s a Tri-5 Chevy, classic Mustang, classic T-Bird, or Corvette. There’s plenty of them. Go ahead and butcher them. Plus it makes the purists mad, and that’s always a good thing.
Door handles are good things. Factory rain gutters are good, (Lead sleds will be exempted from this.)
Owners caught cleaning their cars will lose points. You should have cleaned it before you brought it, and if you did, trust me, it’s clean enough. I can see through a day’s worth of dust. You’re there to have fun. Go buy a Coke and some popcorn, maybe a Big Bar, if you’re in Wisconsin, and go check out what other people brought. Maybe, go check out the swap meet. Don’t worry, your car will be fine, I won’t touch it, unless you got some gay sign saying “Don’t Touch”.
Dual exhaust always beats single exhaust, especially on vehicles that were not originally available with dual exhaust, like straight four and six cars, and wagons. Side pipes trump everything, unless they are not functional, in which case they are a negative.
Fake stuff, and non-functional stuff is frowned upon. Rat Rods with fake tri-power setups are exempt.
Better is better. Front disc brakes always beat front drum brakes, dual pot master cylinders always beat single pot master cylinders. 12 volts always beats 6 volts. Loud is good. Sweet sounding and loud is better.
Modified weird motors are good. Let’s see how much power someone can get out of a Studebaker or International truck engine. Lotsa motor always beats lotsa paint. I’d rather see a big block Nova with a few rust holes and the paint burned off the roof, hood, and trunk, than a perfect body and a weak motor.
I’ve never seen a custom interior that looks better than a stock interior.
I’ve seldom seen a custom paint job that looks better than a factory appearing paint job.
Vinyl graphics suck unless they were a factory option.
Manual transmissions always beat automatics. The more speeds, the better.
No sports cars with automatics will be considered as being worthy of winning any of the top three positions in any category, even if they are the only cars in a particular category.
http://goldengeesenews.blogspot.com/2014/02/new-rules-that-car-shows-should-adopt.html
racing trains... incredibly cool steam locomotive trains in a mash up of Road Runner and Coyote with Indiana Jones Temple of Doom scenes! Its terrific!
Found on http://goawaygarage.blogspot.com/
I love the F1 wings, Pro Street air intakes, "Bridgestone" tires, Flying Tiger motif on the black train, and steam punk throughout. By TVR films,
and their take on the movie Death Race
Saturday, February 22, 2014
how to sell a van with humor
Attention hippies , weirdos , circus freaks , Scooby Doo fans , people from Colorado and those recently released for good behavior.
I am selling this cab over engine 1967 Chevy cargo van so that you can do whatever freaky stuff the voices in your head tell you to do and your therapist says you shouldn’t. This van was once painted like a Scooby Doo Mystery Machine van, and now it sits in the driveway waiting for someone to fill it with peace and love so that it can ramble down the roads again.
I don’t have a title, so you don’t have to worry about the “man” bringing you down or keeping tabs on you via his paperwork, and it has a low mileage greenhouse gas generating 350 Chevy 260hp GM crate engine, Edelbrock aluminum intake and carburetor, rebuilt three speed column shift transmission, rebuilt radiator, all under the “dog house” that also makes a great place for you to hide your weed.
I don’t dig on vans so if you do, this one can be your righteous and mother beautiful ride. On a positive note, the body has a bit of rust for you types that like that sort of natural returning to Earth , I don’t bathe or comb my hair look.
It also has a rebuilt 3.42 gear ratio rear axle(you could hide your weed in there too). Keep in mind that this thing is huge on the inside and you can transport a LOT of weed in it.
The first picture is what this van looked like before the Man at the corporation rained downed us for having this van painted like their copyrighted image and forced us into removing the paint.
Bring a trailer to float this baby home because she hasn’t been started in several years and the fuel has gone sour. We had rebuilt the brakes with new shoes, springs and cylinders, but time has brought them down from sitting. For you antisocial types or the romantically challenged, rope and duct tape must be purchased separately .
For you Renaissance festival types, there is room enough for a mattress in the back that a Lord can layeth with thy wench that thy Lady need not knoweth about.
$1300 firm is a steal. Wow man, think about the possibilities.
This van is also great for smuggling Mexicans, drugs or running armament. However, most people frown on its use as a school/day care bus, so you may not want to use it for that.
The views expressed in this ad do not necessarily reflect the views of the seller. Seller does not condone the sale or use of weed, Mexicans, rope or duct tape. Libyan terrorists types need not apply. Take your plutonium elsewhere.
All joking aside, if you are interested in the van, pick up the phone and call me. Yes, it is for sale.
Found on http://bangshift.com/blog/craigslist-find-a-scooby-van-with-an-epic-description-of-its-smuggling-potential-must-read.html
Friday, February 21, 2014
Thursday, February 20, 2014
Jeep quote of the day
"If a Jeep can't get you there, you better parachute in"
says me, Justacarguy Jesse
says me, Justacarguy Jesse
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